A man is visited at his home by two IRS agents who inform him he must come in for an audit due to income discrepancies. One agent begins to photograph items in the home as the other escorts the gentlemen under investigation to the IRS car.
They make small talk until the other agent is done with taking photos. They ride to the local branch office to continue the interview.
An agent asks him why he has so much money if he doesn't work. The man replies that he loves to gamble....but he's VERY good at it. The agents aren't buying it. So the man suggests something to prove how good a gambler he is.
The man then bets one agent that he can bite his own eye.
The agent bites (no pun intended
) at the offer.
"I bet you one thousand dollars I can bite my own eye." He maneuvers his glass eye from the socket and lightly bites it.
The agents shudder as the man poses another bet.
"How about this, I'm a fair man, double or nothing that I can bite my other eye."
The crafty agent KNOWS this man did not walk into the office with a blind cane, so he takes the bet.
The man removes his false teeth and nibbles at the other eye.
The agents shudder again.
"Now that's two thousand you owe me! "
The agents look on completely puzzled.
"OK, OK...how about this to spice things up a bit. Double or nothing....4 thousand for me if I win....I bet you I can stand on one side of your desk and urinate into the trash can on the opposite side. So how about it?"
The agent smiles to himself, knowing it would be completely impossible and a sure win for him....so he accepts the bet.
The man unzips and goes to town. The stream barely makes it halfway across the desk and as it subsides to a dribble, the agent begins to rejoice jubilantly! "Yes! Yes! I WIN! Hahaha!
The other agent buries his face in his hands and begins to shake his head....he looks to the other agent very disappointedly.
The joyful agent asks, "What's wrong?! I just won the bet!"
The other agent stares at him blankly and replies," In the car while you took photos, he bet me ten thousand dollars that he could urinate all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it.
Bumpa Ching (rimsting)
"Life is shorter than we've been lead to believe. Soak it all up like a dry sponge!"
"If I never win anything else in life, I smile knowing I came in first place in a race of billions!"